Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Come share oat with me in your robe
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
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