I just made out with a guy for $7.
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
Randomize
