I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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