I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
we're making bets on your personal life
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
