we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
Randomize