I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize