woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
Two ladies just showed up with my fucking purse. It was in the fucking street. I'm a train wreck. As a financial advisor, this shouldn't happen. I should be an adult.
I have bruises all over my body. Seriously, I'm a train wreck. I'm too damn old for hangovers like this.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
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