Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize
