I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
