The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Randomize
