The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Success! We fucked roommates!
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Randomize
