i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
