too bad you live with your parents still
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize