At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
