Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
Randomize
