my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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