...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
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