How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
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