Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Randomize
