I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
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