i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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