Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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