I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
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