I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize
