I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
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