weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Are my feet made of real feet?
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
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