Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize