I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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