69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize