I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Banned from zoo.
Again?
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
