I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
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