i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Randomize