I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize
