I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
