I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
Randomize