belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize
