i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
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