i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
All the doctor said was why
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
Randomize
