I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
found the other keg... it's in the tree
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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