There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Randomize
