I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
two words: eviction party
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Randomize
