Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
