really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
i need some magic done to my vagina
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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