Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Blood and glitter go together right?
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Randomize
