K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Tell her she can't have a vagina
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I need to stop coming to work sober
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
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