She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
He felt like a one man threesome
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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