okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
