we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Randomize
