How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
