VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
