I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
